bootson | Music Meme version 2.0

Fandom: Star Trek XI
Pairing/Characters: Kirk/McCoy and individual for each
Rating:c Eh...PG-13
Warnings: One has character death...I'll *** it.
Disclaimer: We’ve been through this…I’m poor so I’m not making money off writing or royalties. Nothing’s mine.
A/N: I haven't cleaned these up at all and I kept getting interrupted while I was doing it anyway. There's not necessarily any connection but you can read them as one disjointd story, maybe. I doubt the characterization is any good, let alone the words themselves. Still, if I wrote it, it's damn well getting posted somewhere. This will probably never see the light of day anywhere outside this here post. But here’s to hoping I can write other things now.

1. “Cowgirls Don’t Cry” Brooks & Dunn ft. Reba

God dammit. This was going to kill him. Len closed his eyes and tried to find some hidden reserve of strength, the only one still remaining even though it was practically depleted.

“Daddy?” The small voice asked, tugging at his index finger. Tears were filling those big hazel eyes, the ones that matched his.

Joanna was so small, young, innocent. And here they were, tearing her life apart. He’d love to blame Jocelyn, but he couldn’t. This was his fault too, and he was damn well old enough to own his own blame. Instead of casting around the blame, he reached for her, lifting her into a tight hug and kissing her dark curls.

“I’ll see you as soon as I can.” And aw, hell. She was breaking out the big guns. For being just shy of three, Joanna had that damn pout down to a science. “You be good for your mama, my little cowgirl.”

Once she was on her feet again, Len didn’t look back.

2. “Just a Dream” Carrie Underwood

Three days and they were still orbiting the piss-yellow colored rock. Three days since the away team had come back on the captain’s orders. Three days since Jim’s latest fool scheme had managed to get him lost in the middle of an apocalypse.

The weather didn’t appear to be clearing on this side of the so-called planet. Spock was tetchy, scanning for breaks in the storm but there didn’t seem to be any. Without knowledge of the typical climate and a group of hostile villagers who had no idea what the difference between friendly and villainous was, they couldn’t make any educated guesses, ask questions, or look back through data banks for even vague allusions.

All they could do was wait. If there was anything Leonard McCoy had learned from Jim Kirk, it was his impatience. If someone didn’t get a hypo induced coma before that dumb ass kid got himself found, well, Len was going to consider that his own personal win.

3. “Cruz” Christina Aguilera

Jim Kirk didn’t look back. He’d left home without a second glance, ran out of Iowa without so much as a wave, jumped on the Enterprise as Captain without so much as a wink; well, maybe just a wink and a smirk. He’d never looked back and never thought he wanted to. There was nothing behind you except mistakes and disdain, accomplishments and the known.

He wanted the unknown, always had if he wanted to admit it. But for the first time in his life, he was looking back as he started down the corridor to the transporter room. Bones wasn’t going to follow him, hating goodbyes more than Jim himself.

But he’d be back. He’d kick ass, take names, forget the names and come back. Because, fuck, if he didn’t…well, he knew he’d miss this, miss Bones, even if he didn’t have any more conscious thoughts.

4. “Wild At Heart” Gloriana

“They’ll try to break you every time,” Jim was saying, slamming back shot number what-the-hell-ever.

Len leaned against the corner of the bar, having lost his stool in a fit of southern charm to some sweet little blonde thing that hadn’t given Jim the time of day. He leaned closer, sliding his own beer in front of Jim just to see him smile his thanks. Shit, when that kid smiled…

“You gonna let them break you, Jim?”

“Fuck, no. I don’t break.” In that instant, Len knew they were having one of those infamous Kirkian dual-leveled conversations. “They want to push me, you know what I’m going to do.” Jim got to his feet more gracefully than Len anticipated, starting through the crowd, all low-slung jeans and six different shades of sin on his face when he smirked over his shoulder.

Oh, yeah. Len knew what Jim did when you pushed him. He fought and, eventually, you lost. The kid was wild and there was no amount of bureaucratic bullshit that would take that from him.

5. “XO” Fall Out Boy

He shoved, tugged, pulled, led the way through the crowd. The crowd was making him claustrophobic, but he didn’t care. Two minutes and they’d be out in the blissfully cool air of a mid-autumn San Fran night. The first night of shore leave and no one wanted to separate yet, least of all him. But he didn’t care about the crew, the other glorious celebratory expressions for surviving missions they should have lost. His only care was the bicep he was gripping when the emergency exit doors swung open and the black of night enveloped them.

They weren’t making it to the hotel; they weren’t making it another step. This dance they’d been running for the past God-only-knew how many years was ending tonight, he decided as he shoved Bones against the brick of the wall. He didn’t wait for the protest or the questions, lips catching his best friend’s like a fucking prayer and a plea all in one. Bones’ hands were on him immediately, lips moving against his.

If someone came out now, they were bound for a show. Well, fuck ‘em. They could watch; Jim knew it was going to be one hell of a scene.

***[character death]***6. “Show Me The Meaning of Being Lonely” Backstreet Boys (are you fucking KIDDING ME Rhapsody?)

They had always known this would happen. There were only so many ways they could end, knowing neither of them would ever walk away willingly. No, the way they would end had always been written before the beginning was drafted. In the final act, one was ending up alone. The only question was: which one? Would the one with the abandonment issues be left behind, per usual, or was it supposed to be the one who always lost everything due to the mistakes he inevitably made?

Come to think of it, that wasn’t a question either. Jim always ran full-tilt into bad situations. Len couldn’t fix him forever. Eventually, it was going to be too much, Jim was going to expect too much and Len was going to fail. And fail he did, spectacularly as his whole life bled out on a God damned cave floor.

In the end, it was always meant to be like this. Jim gone, having saved a dignitary and a whole starship while Len was left with his scotch and lack of purpose. Because what came next? Where did he go when he didn’t have Jim to follow?

7. “There Goes My Life” Kenny Chesney

Weddings were shit. No one really liked them except the bride and groom. The parents pretended, but they hated the money and loss involved. Leonard wasn’t sure he’d ever be ready to let Joanna go, having missed too much of her life already.

He’d missed a whole lifetime of firsts. Jim promised that at least he’d be there for the first wedding, which earned him a sharp smack to the back of his head. Jim only laughed, as he was want to do, and wrapped an arm around Len’s waist.

And Joanna, good Lord, she’d never been more beautiful. Even at the reception, with the frilly dress traded out for an expertly tailored suit, she was radiance and perfection, all the things Leonard could ever have wanted. She blew kisses and waved, caught a hug from him and a kiss from Jim before she ran off to make her shuttle that would take her away as an entirely new person. He didn’t watch, eyes tracing stars in the sky and blinking rapidly. This was ridiculous; it wasn’t as if he’d never see her again. Still, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d lost the most important thing he’d ever had for the second time.

Warm lips pressed to his jaw brought him back. Reaching out, he found Jim’s hand and squeezed.

8. “Broken Glass” Buckcherry

Rough edges surrounded them, metaphorically of course. Not that it hadn’t happened literally, that just wasn’t the present case. They weren’t soft around the edges, too hardened by time and twisted lives. They’d been places and seen things long before they should have, but that didn’t matter. Not when they were like this, not when it was just them, not when they let it all fall away and let the vulnerabilities shine through.

No matter how many times they ended up here, cools sheets juxtaposed by hot mouths, smooth caresses sharpened by the sting of teeth in the perfect places.

And it was everything, not just release. This was everything either of them could ask for if they’d only known to ask for it.

9. “What It’s Like” Britney Spears ft. Justin Timberlake (Rhapsody clearly does not enjoy this exercise)

“Don’t say it,” Jim snapped, getting to his feet in less than a heartbeat. Pity wasn’t what he wanted, not what he needed now.

Bones rolled his eyes and it made his temper shoot up even more. “Since when did you get telepathic abilities, kid?”

“Like I don’t fucking know what you’re going to say,” he bit out. Things were getting intense and Jim never dealt well with intense, emotionally and personally intense. Nothing was more intense than lose in its most unadulterated form. “You’re going to pretend like you have the first fucking clue what this is like. Guess what, McCoy, you don’t.”

“Don’t I?” He asked, blank expression giving Spock a run for his money.

“No. They were it! I wasn’t close to her and I sure as hell hated his ass, but now? Now I don’t even fucking have that!” It was going to hit soon and he didn’t want to be here when it did, but he never made it to the door. Arms were around his shoulders, holding him in place until he stopped fighting and accepted the extra strength. He could afford it, afford to cling and not be so desolate, just this once.

10. “Her Diamonds” Rob Thomas

Jim found him sitting in a corner, pretending he didn’t exist while they waited for shuttles. This was a simulation but it might as well have been the real thing. The dark was as oppressive as it was freeing. He was free, Bones was oppressed.

He slipped onto the bench, sliding close until he could feel body heat. Bones still hadn’t moved. Words weren’t going to work this time, not when he was ready to break, fear clawing at his throat until he would just rant and rave and hope no one noticed.

But Jim always noticed. Slowly, he reached out, hand falling to Bones’ knee and squeezing a bit too hard.

“Jim…”

“Shh.” He breathed, arm going around his shoulders and pulling him close. “It’s fine. It’ll be over as soon as it starts. And I’m going to be there the whole time.”

“What a damn relief. God dammit, Jim, get off me. What in hell’s name are you doing?”

Holding on tighter, Jim leaned their temples together. “I’m sharing. You can have some of the confidence today. I’ll take it back tomorrow.”